61716; 9:18am

Of course I am glad that you let me go when you did because I really needed that extra push to do what I need to do and to get myself together, but I also still feel so angry right now. All this anger and resentment I feel towards you currently, I am at my lowest and have no one to talk to about anything. You left me when I had nothing left, when I needed you the most to be there. So yes, I’m angry.

I’m angry because now, I miss you and I miss being around you and having your calm attitude to keep me calm and sane. I’ve never really felt like being around someone would make me a better person but you make me a better person. You keep me calm and you motivate me. I wish there could’ve been something that I was able to do for you but it just seems like all I ever do is cause you trouble.

I always thought I was a good person until I met you. You’re an even better person than me. I’m so petty and passive aggressive sometimes. How do I channel all these emotions? All these emotions from frustration and anger, to yearning and sadness.

The time I spent with you, I never thought I could get so close to someone like that within just a couple of months. Especially someone that would just change my life so much, make me better. It’s ridiculous. But I can also tell that I seem to need you more than you need me. It’s not that I can’t handle being alone because I can and it’s great to be able to be alone sometimes. But I really do miss you. It’s the feeling of someone being in your life at one point and then they’re not all of a sudden.

It’s only been a couple of weeks but that feels like too much time already…

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