092116; 9:04pm

It’s so crazy when you realize how only about 20% of the people you’ve ever met in your life have actually made an impact on you, have actually made you think, or learn, or ever want to remember, both good and bad. Having met thousands of people and you realize that they have not been of relevance to you. 

It’s so funny though, when you’re drunk or on drugs or just high off anything, that at that moment you just talk about so many things as if you actually had a connection. Next thing you know, you wake up the next day not even giving a shit about what you’ve talked about or really even about the person themselves. 

Sometimes it legit feels like a waste of my time. Never to say that I am any better than anyone I have ever met. But really, why waste time on people you don’t really care about when you could be focusing on the ones who you do?

It’s annoying. People are annoying. Sometimes I even wish I can either turn back time to never meet them, or just forget about them altogether. But when you see them in the streets, you still remember… Oh she’s that one girl I got high with… Or he’s that guy that I bought drugs off of and we got wasted… Or it’s that group of people I met at the bar one night and got drunk with. 

You’ll remember them for some time, maybe add them on Facebook or Instagram or whatever was in at the time. And then later on in life you’ll still just be like, oh it’s that guy/girl who comes up on your news feed. But you don’t care about their life or how they’re doing, they’re still just that person you once met. 

I wish I had known this sooner. Those filler people. The ones who you never care about and may never remember, but were just around to fill the time. Wasn’t it still lonely then? Why waste time being lonely with people, when you could simply be lonely alone?

“Death had a kind face. In her loneliness, he was her best friend.”

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